Thursday, August 11, 2011

August 11th, 2011 - Day 33 of 60

The Diet of Worms
When you go back to eating solid food, your system gets a bit of a shock.  The 30 days of light-duty you gave to your intestines was taken for granted, like so many things taken for granted by our spoiled, soft and ungrateful bodies.  Once it was called back into action by the presence of an apple or a carrot or, heaven forbid, cabbage, someone had to run into the bedroom, roust it out alarmingly and insist it get down there right away as things were starting up again.  After putting on it's robe, staggering around the room, tripping over the dog and managing to put on one slipper, your digestive system half-fell and half-ran down the stairs and found whatever it was we ate after the juice portion of the Reboot was over.  Its groggy, half-hearted efforts at digesting are similar to the distracted efforts at driving one sees on the freeway in the morning hours: Driving combined with dressing, make-up application, eating pancakes, typing a memo, reading a map, holding a conference call, finishing up a PowerPoint presentation and smoking.  You can imagine the results.  The gurgling and growling portend the problem.  But, after a couple days things are back to normal.  The intestinal inconvenience gives way to business as usual in no time.  Now for some, the routine isn't so easy.  For most of us, piles of raw fruits, vegetables and nuts are a jaw-abusing joy.  For some, they are the gastronomic equivalent of high school cliques.  It is the "cool kids" group to which they feel they'll never belong.  Just a cursory look around the Reboot message board will show that digesting raw fruits and vegetables isn't within everyone's grasp.  More maladies than one can shake a stick at cause issues with this process and makes the simple act of eating an apple a painful one.  Like everything in life, a pill can be offered for some of these issues.  Some, however, feel a pill to allow one to eat something that will make them healthy seems to be an oxymoron.  In fact, some with digestive issues have gone to strange extremes to avoid ingesting pharmaceutical toxins.  Some feel the ingestion of actual worms will soothe their cranky colons.  Ingesting worm eggs, allowing them to hatch, grow and then "move on" is something a few doctors think is helpful.  The theory is that our past lives were not as sanitary as our current anti-bacterial-soap-filled lives, so worms were are part of our biology (and, likely, our breakfast).  This may explain why many of the digestive and similar maladies were not a part of our vocabulary.  Why?  I don't know.  It may be something the worm gives us or it may be how our bodies react to the worms.  Whatever it is, when faced with dire circumstances, eating a worm seems a lot more reasonable to me than eating refried beans and drinking a Pepsi ever will.

The Diet of Worms - Part 2
The city of "Worms" in Germany is famous, not only for its giggle-inspiring name, but for hosting several imperial meetings ordered to discuss all matters relating to the Almighty.  No, not the dollar, the creator of all things.  No, not Steve Jobs, God. The most famous of these councils was the "Diet of Worms of 1521."  This was the council that Emperor Charles V emceed to determine if Martin Luther should be given a good old-fashioned beat down. Luther, as you may recall, had the audacity to think for himself and challenge the all-consuming, all-powerful, all-tithe-collecting and all-indulgence-selling church.  Of course, the church, in its wisdom, decided that Luther was a heretic and needed to be tortured (in God's mercy).  But, with all the wars with which everyone was involved, Luther didn't get as much attention as they would have liked.  Eventually the powers that be lost interest, he came back into mainstream life and everyone yawned,  Luther, now free of the tyrannical, narrow-minded bullies, ushered in the age of different tyrannical, narrow-minded bullies.  Amen.

The Diet of Worms - Part 3
Not everyone can eat raw food.  Not everyone likes raw food.  Eskimos, bless their hearts, eat raw blubber, but not many green things.  We all look a bit different and eat a bit different.  What works for someone's body may not work for yours.  So, some may need to eat worms to help their tummy get better.  Some naughty boys get a Council of Worms to help their enemies feel better.  In the end, it is all worms and it doesn't really matter.  In the end, we all go back to the worms and it doesn't matter. In the end, the worms are about choice.  Religion, medicine or lunch: choice. If it works for you, then you should go with it.  Sure, there are "experts" in the field.  A doctor with test tubes can prove that worms might help some.  It doesn't mean everyone needs them (at least not yet) or should use them.  There are "experts" in religion who like calling councils at Worms and telling you how to think.  Doesn't mean everyone is a heretic and that everyone is even accused.  Doesn't mean we should all believe the same.  In fact, we all know those "experts" were not always right, now were they?

Get 10 experts in a room and you have 11 opinions.  When it comes to the "best" diet, I usually just roll my eyes.  I know there are many who really, really want to help.  They want to find the secret to the perfect diet.  Some want the perfect diet so they can be "right".  Some want to find the perfect diet so they can sell books.  Some want to find the perfect diet as they just like puzzles.  Most of us are trying to live our lives.  While diet is an important part of our lives, it is a means to an end.  All of our gurus have an opinion and we love it when they are right.  Sometimes they are wrong.  Sometimes there is no right or wrong. Sometimes gurus just like to sell books and make money and be adored.  In the end, what I care about is YOU.  If you are happy, healthy and in a good place, I say "keep it up."  All I want is for you to be up to your neck in a wonderful life.  This isn't about raw religion, diet dogma or food fundamentalism.  We are here to try something because our old way isn't working.  For some this may end up being the "old way".  If so, go in peace, my child.

Everyone sing it with me.... 

"Nobody likes me, everybody hates me, I'm gonna go eat wooooOOOOOooorms."

I am 55% through the 60 days.

Weight: 146 lbs.
Up a pound.  I'll probably go up more.

Food:  Same as yesterday (exactly).
No, I didn't eat these, but I always put some picture here, so...

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